3 Ways Men Benefit from Therapy
Three easy reasons why men should be in therapy.
–Steven Rishard, MS, LAPC
BCA Therapist APRIL, 2025
#1. Live longer.
#2. More ease.
#3. Greater personal satisfaction.
3 ways men benefit from therapy
LIVE LONGER.
No, really, I mean it. The stigmas that keep many men from seeking help
are driving them into the grave at at faster rate. There is enough evidence from the last
ten years of studies to suggest that some of the reasons men’s lifespans are shorter are
- due to a lack of connected relationships
- less attention to stress management
- not enough time spent on mental health.
We need more people around us as we get older,
and men with a greater number of connected relationships have more people looking
out for their well being, sharing in their ups and downs, and giving them a greater
sense of community. Men who attend to their inner turmoil, ( anger, anxiety, sadness,
etc. ) are more likely to have better health benefits
- lower blood pressure
- less risk of cardiovascular disease.
We live longer with a nervous system that is
cared for as opposed to ignored. Though therapy can occasionally be tough, it is
always a great way to learn to care for yourself.
MORE EASE.
Most of us do not grow up with a ready made bag of tactics for stress
management and/or tools for great communication, nor do most of us develop sure fire
ways to manage our expectations for our lives, but the way most men are raised in our
western culture leaves them at a greater disadvantage. Being in any relationship has
it’s challenges, be it with a spouse, a sibling, a parent, co-worker, or a child.
Men who actively learn better ways to communicate and manage stress find their relationships
more enjoyable and fruitful. Not to mention what it can do for the daily tasks of living.
Responsibilities and pressures mount, but they do not have to rule the day. Life should
feel less like punching at the ocean, and a little more like adapting to the ebb and flow
of the changes.
Therapy is great for learning how to do this, and more.
GREATER PERSONAL SATISFACTION.
Socrate’s gave us a great quote in “The unexamined
life is not worth living.”
Our world moves much faster and louder than his, still taking
the time and effort to reflect on your life is always worth it. Many men are trying to
engage with their lives within a set of values and beliefs they have had no time to stop
and examine.
All men have been affected by the idea of an “ideal” man. Mythologies
and legacies of “manhood” pervade every culture and family. Without examination,
without occasional reflection and reorganization of our perspectives, men can easily
loose sight of what might bring them more enjoyment, fulfillment, and meaning.
Often when this happens men can be left with a sense of shame, of not “measuring up”.
Simply sitting with someone who’s task it is to help you sort through it all, can be of
great benefit.
If you are looking for support and would like to experience some of these benefits, we are here to help.
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Self-Injury Awareness Day
Self-Injury Awareness Day, or SIAD, is a global awareness event celebrated on March 1. It draws attention to self-harm in the hope of helping people who practice it. Almost two million Americans engage in self-harm.
About 17% of people will self-harm during their lifetime
How do you observe Self-Injury Awareness Day?
- Check up on a friend: Use Self-Injury Awareness Day to check up on a friend who might be struggling. Remind them that you are there for them and act as a support system for them.
- Wear an orange ribbon: Show your support for the cause and signify that you are a safe person for them to talk to.
- Speak to a professional: Get help from a certified professional.
You’re not alone!
Help is available-
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline:
1-800-273-8255
If Recovery Was Easy, Everyone Would Do It!
If recovery was easy, everyone would do it! Recovery from anything – abuse of alcohol and drugs, trauma, mental illness, parental neglect, intimate partner violence, simply not feeling good enough. Recovery from any of these is not easy.
Recovery takes us to a deep place, an often-lonely place, a place of such truth and vulnerability from which we rise with clarity, honesty, and conviction. Not easy work at all. Recovery is incredibly uncomfortable which is why it is so powerful! No one said it would be easy. No one said it would feel good. No one said it wouldn’t hurt. But it sure is worth it!
“I am not defined by my relapses, but my decision to remain in recover despite them.” – Anonymous
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Setting Boundaries Are Hard!
Setting boundaries is really hard!
And here’s why: we hold expectations and those are really just our attempts at controlling things. No one else is you. No one owes you anything. Your boundaries are yours to own, set, and maintain based on what is most healthy for YOU.
Recovery from anything is possible when you have honesty, boundaries, self-love, and balance.
Compassion Does Not Equate to Poor Boundaries
Yes, it is ABSOLUTELY possible to have both!!
Yes, you can be a compassionate person AND have healthy boundaries!!
Remember, putting on your oxygen mask first will then allow you to more effectively assist those around you. Do you get it?
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Three Minute Therapy
Anywhere, Anytime Coping Skills
A limit to some commonly used coping skills is that they can’t be used anywhere or at any time. You can’t whip out your journal in a board meeting or even begin to stretch and breathe deeply while giving a presentation.
Here are two anywhere anytime coping skills to add to your tool box. Use these when you are feeling anxious, overwhelmed, nervous, or unsure of yourself.
1. Color game – choose a color and count how many objects are within your eyesight that are that color. Ideally, pick a calming color like blue or green.
2. The five senses – connect to your sense of taste, touch, see, smell, and hear. Can you rub a soft or rough spot on your clothing? Can you hear the sound of laughter or music? Can you divert your attention to something pleasing?
Why do these work? Both of these skills keep us grounded and in the moment. We are increasing our awareness of our environment, slowing down our thought process, and regaining control over our breathing and central nervous system simply by having a narrow focus.
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